Once upon a time, in a land where carrots grew like weeds and onions sang opera, lived a donkey named Dan. But not just any donkey! Dan was a dapper donkey, always sporting a bow tie, even in the bathtub!

One day, Dan decided he wanted to be rich. "No more munching on hay for me!" he declared, adjusting his monocle. "I'm going to rob a bank!"

He fashioned a mask from a discarded sock (it was striped, of course) and galloped to the bank, his hooves clomping on the cobblestone path.

Bursting through the bank doors, Dan yelled, "This is a robbery! Hand over the carrots, or face my wrath!"

The bank teller, a portly pig named Prudence, fainted right then and there, scattering coins everywhere.

Dan, momentarily startled, regained his composure. "Easy pickings," he muttered, stuffing carrots into his satchel.

Unbeknownst to Dan, a grumpy ogre named Shrek was enjoying a mud bath behind the bank. The commotion had disturbed his peaceful soak.

"What in the swamp is all that racket?" he grumbled, stomping towards the bank, his green ears steaming.

He burst through the doors to see Dan stuffing his face with stolen carrots, crumbs tumbling down his chin.

"Why, you little..." Shrek roared, flexing his massive biceps. The sight was so terrifying, Dan froze mid-chew.

Shrek, with a flick of his monstrous arm, sent Dan flying into a pile of hay, the stolen carrots scattering around him.

Dan, dazed and defeated, realized crime didn't pay, especially when facing a bicep-bulging ogre. From then on, he stuck to munching on hay.

As for Shrek, he enjoyed a nice carrot cake, courtesy of Prudence, who was still recovering from the shock, but grateful for the ogre's intervention.